Sarah Hawkins

Being a Christian my views on my death are not sad. It is a celebration as I move on to be with my lord. The only sadness involved may be left with those I leave behind, but I hope this is short lived and that they will rejoice for me. I rejoice in the thought of being with my lord and do not fear death in any way.

Throughout my life I have carried by my side a dark friend. I call it a friend, as it has been my companion for so many years that in a way it is a friend indeed. Depression is a fact of my life and living with it and in spite of it, has at times been very hard. More so, I believe, for those nearest to me. I will not be sorry to leave this darkness behind when death finally comes, but do not look to death to release me from it. It has enabled me to grow in so many ways, and with constant care from my family and very dear friends, I rejoice daily in my life. God is ever constant for me and has surely carried me through many dark times.

My death will be the closing of my earthly life, but the beginning of my heavenly life. This must definitely be a reason to rejoice.

So my friends REJOICE for GOD IS GOOD!

DENIM CASKET

What would I wear to my own funeral? What do I wear now? Jeans! I pretty much always wear jeans. Comfortable, tatty, frayed, torn, stained, dark, bleached jeans. Why would I wear anything else?

I have been keeping all the outgrown and worn out pairs of jeans from my family and this seemed the perfect use for them. Items of clothing that were so comfortable that they were worn until they fell apart.

I love the whole thing about jeans. The feel, the colours, the way they fray. I love how they feel so comfortable you forget you are wearing them. The go with everything. You can dress them up or down for almost any occasion.

Making the covering for my casket out of these pairs of jeans is so me. So personal knowing the jeans had been loved and worn by people I loved.

It was important, when stitching the pieces of jeans together to retain their character. No neat edges, lots of fraying, not too tightly fitted as they were when being worn. Lots of over-laying, representing the layers that build up as we live our lives. I purposefully stitched the pieces together using one universal blue thread, signifying the constancy of my wearing jeans for every occasion. One colour thread for every shade of denim.

The base of the casket cover has been stitched and fitted together leaving no gaps. This is to represent the fact that jeans form the basis for my entire wardrobe. There is always at least one pair in there.
When making the lid of the casket, I left the tears and slits in the denim open, purposefully allowing the fabric underneath to show through. This represents the other side of my nature. Showing that I am flawed and worn and frayed. I chose the fabric underneath to show the side of me that is covered by my jeans. The velvet represents the sensual, sexual, vibrant, alive and fiery inside of me, of which glimpses are seen through the everyday person.

Whilst preparing the pairs of jeans, I checked through the pockets and found a number of items that had been forgotten and left. This starting me thinking of all the things that had happened in the past that I had forgotten. People and places left behind.
From this discovery, I decided to place objects in the pockets on the casket to represent the important parts of my life that have been party to making me as I am now. These objects are from my very person and good or bad, they are very much part of me.

CURTAIN

As I have already mentioned, death to me is the closing of earthly life and the opening of heavenly life. The phrase ‘that’s curtains for so and so’, sparked the idea for this piece. Closing the curtains on this life and at the same time opening the curtains to eternal life.

I chose an old curtain that has faded through the years, to represent how our bodies fade. The moving nearer to God and to see his face shine upon mine is the main picture of the piece.
I believe God’s love and grace rain down on us, whether we know it or not, even if we can not always see it.

This piece shows Gods’ grace raining down on me as I travel on to my life with my lord.